Things I have learned today via the magic of Stallone
Sunday, August 19th, 2012 12:03 am- Chuck Norris is harder than all the other Expendables AND all the baddies without even trying.
- Chuck Norris is SO hard he can steal Clint Eastwood's theme tune and nobody tells him off.
- The Governator still can't act, and is looking pretty scrawny these days.
- a film can always be improved by the addition of MOAR ACTION HEROES.
- Jet Li does a great Jackie Chan impression if you make enough saucepans available to him
- Jean Claude Van Damme's party piece flying kick would lose him both bollocks and a kidney if he tried it in an ACTUAL fight, it's so slow.
- The best expendable in terms of all round fight skill, brains, and versatility... is the girl.
I enjoyed the Expendables 2 very much. Because, lets face it, if I'm GOING to watch a film that doesn't even try to pass the Bechdel test it might as well be one with enormous explosions and so much testosterone you practically grow bollocks just being in a room where it's showing. It was silly and cheesy and over the top and utterly, utterly hilarious, and I recommend it thoroughly.
- Chuck Norris is SO hard he can steal Clint Eastwood's theme tune and nobody tells him off.
- The Governator still can't act, and is looking pretty scrawny these days.
- a film can always be improved by the addition of MOAR ACTION HEROES.
- Jet Li does a great Jackie Chan impression if you make enough saucepans available to him
- Jean Claude Van Damme's party piece flying kick would lose him both bollocks and a kidney if he tried it in an ACTUAL fight, it's so slow.
- The best expendable in terms of all round fight skill, brains, and versatility... is the girl.
I enjoyed the Expendables 2 very much. Because, lets face it, if I'm GOING to watch a film that doesn't even try to pass the Bechdel test it might as well be one with enormous explosions and so much testosterone you practically grow bollocks just being in a room where it's showing. It was silly and cheesy and over the top and utterly, utterly hilarious, and I recommend it thoroughly.



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Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 12:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 12:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 09:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 12:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 07:49 am (UTC)While it was never going to pass the bechdel test I do like that the female fighter it in doesn't get saved and does do some saving and is just are good as the boys in a fight
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Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 09:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 09:36 am (UTC)The first one does have the hispanic police lieutenant from Dexter in it as the bad guy though
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Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 10:13 pm (UTC)Angel Batista with his silly little hat?
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Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 10:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 10:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 07:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Sunday, August 19th, 2012 08:05 pm (UTC)