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[personal profile] miss_s_b
Valentine's Day.

I notice that a few of you have posted a valentine's meme where you try to get people to send you virtual valentines...

I won't be doing that. Nor will I be adding to any of your tallies.

Here, for your delectation is a rant I posted elsewhere, which may explain why:
I don't generally object to the idea of love, but I do object to it being sanitised and packaged and sold. Love isn't as predictable and safe as that. It's not red heart shapes and fluffy kittens and roses; it's the inability to spend a second of your day without thinking about someone. You can't package THAT and sell it for £4.99.

I also object to the idea that if you love someone you should only show them on one particular day of the year, and that the best way to show them is by buying a card with someone else's fake sentiments in, or a box of chocolates which have been made by the exploitation of hundreds of poverty-stricken cocoa-growers in the third world, or a rose which has been sprayed with pesticides and has been doubled in price especially for the day.

"Here, darling, to show how much I adore you I have contributed to the big fat profits of several Evil Multinational Corporations AND the suppression of the poor AND the destruction of the planet! Isn't that romantic? I also showed how monumentally stupid I am by buying something today for a good double the price it will be tomorrow..."

If a lover of mine decided they wanted to celebrate Valentine's Day, it'd have to be something they made themselves, I'm afraid. I don't do commercialism.
I'll get down off me soapbox now, eh?

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:24 pm (UTC)

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bibliophile1887.livejournal.com
Couldn't agree more.

However, what I hate about VDay is the way it makes single people feel like they are the unimportant/worthless/useless part of the population for the simple fact that they cannot participate in this "exclusive" "holiday." Nothing brings out the depression more in single people than Valentine's Day - with the possible exception of Christmas.

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
It's worse than that; Valentine's Day is designed to make you CONFORM. If you're single you should still buy cards and send them to your crush!

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] bibliophile1887.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:15 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] senor-biggles.livejournal.com
*steals soapbox, fashions it into a telephone booth with a heart on the side, presents it to [livejournal.com profile] snapesbabe*

=D

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
If you think I'm going in there and changing into superman you're going to be sadly disappointed...

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] senor-biggles.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 02:13 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 02:18 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] options3000.livejournal.com
I'm with ya. Another evil trick of the evil business empires!

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missdiane.livejournal.com
You know you're not going to get any disagreement from me with that vent.

I shall likely be wearing black on V-day, as is my tradition. Though interestingly instead of moping, I'm hoping to retain my current attitude - which yesterday I was laying claim to the hot new faculty member that's currently driving here from Florida by referring to him as "my boyyyfriend" LOL

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:58 pm (UTC)

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com
Love isn't as predictable and safe as that. It's not red heart shapes and fluffy kittens and roses; it's the inability to spend a second of your day without thinking about someone.

While I agree with your sentiment I don't agree with your statement. Its quite possible to love or be in love with someone without thinking about them every second of your day. I love my parents I feel not the need to be constantly talking about them for example - ditto my good friends. Certainly in the "honeymoon" period love has an almost obsessional cognitive hold on your thoughts (this is the time when a second won't go by without thinking about the object of your affections in a situtation of romantic love) however this doesn't generally last the duration of the relationship (even if the relationship lasts for your relative period of forever (until the day you die)). Love is safe and predictable if you ask me - or it becomes safe and predictable and a comfort as much as a romantic engagement - otherwise I think you are implying either people can't get on with their lifes because their neural pathways are blocked by thoughts of their significant other for the rest of their days... ;)

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
Or, because I'm female, I can think of more than one thing at once... ;)

I wasn't just talking about romantic love; there's barely a second of the day goes by when I'm not thinking about Shrubby.

Also "talking about" and "thinking about" are not interchangeable concepts.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:16 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:18 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:22 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:24 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:33 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:50 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:54 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] kcontheroad.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 06:49 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Sunday, February 4th, 2007 08:07 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com
I agree with most of what you say. Commercialization of anything is something I think is bad and something that warps the underlying/original intention of whatever it was (or was supposed to be) in the beginning.

Aside from that I actually think Valentine's Day can be a good thing. A lot of people have busy lives and either can't or don't take the time to tell/show their loved one that they care by spending some quality time together.

I really enjoy valentine's day (even did when I was single). These days Valentine's Day is an opportunity for my significant other and I to dress to the nines and head out on the town, eat some fabulous food and spend the whole night together, talking and laughing and having fun; not worrying about anything but the connection we have with each other.

Could we do this on any day? sure. There's nothing stopping us. The thing about Valentine's day is that it's on *every* calendar you see, going "hey, even if you can only do this once a year, look, it's already scheduled for you".

I don't ask for or give presents on this day, I don't see this as the purpose or intention of Valentine's Day. The last time I gave something it was roses that I hand-made out of tissue paper from the grocery store and gave to all my friends.

It saddens me that so many single people think that they have to hate Valentine's Day, or that they are supposed to feel second class or something on that day. In my thoughts, as a single person, one ought to spend the day/evening having quality time with onesself or with one's friends. There are always people to make room to spend time with, it doesn't have to be someone with whom a sexual love is attached.

There is a lot wrong with our holidays as they have been commercialized by the business world; but that doesn't stop us from seeking to celebrate (or ignore, if that's what one thinks is more important) with the original intention.

This is all just my opinion, everyone else may feel differently and are encouraged and free to do so.

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
an opportunity for my significant other and I to dress to the nines and head out on the town, eat some fabulous food and spend the whole night together, talking and laughing and having fun; not worrying about anything but the connection we have with each other.

If I had someone with whom I wanted to do that sort of thing, I'd be doing it any day APART from Valentine's Day, out of an annoyance at being expected to conform to some societal schedule. LOL.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:21 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neohippie.livejournal.com
I agree with the sentiment that if you love someone, you should show it any time of year.

I also agree that silly cards and roses or singing teddy bears are probably not the best way to show it.

And of course I don't like how single people or people in bad relationships feel left out.

However, I disagree about the chocolates! If anyone wants to give me chocolates, for whatever reason, FEEL FREE! My favorites are Turtles or anything else with caramel, or that really really dark chocolate that's at least 70% cocoa, mmmmmm!

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
I'm just bitter because my intolerance to caffiene means that I can no longer eat chocolate...

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:24 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:26 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:27 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Tuesday, February 6th, 2007 10:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pmoodie.livejournal.com
El and I generally ignore it.

I do sometimes make her a card, that way I'm not putting money into anyone's evil corporate pockets.

But I've just taken her to bleedin' Venice, so any other romantic nonsense I fling at her is going to pale by comparison!

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:24 pm (UTC)

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bibliophile1887.livejournal.com
Couldn't agree more.

However, what I hate about VDay is the way it makes single people feel like they are the unimportant/worthless/useless part of the population for the simple fact that they cannot participate in this "exclusive" "holiday." Nothing brings out the depression more in single people than Valentine's Day - with the possible exception of Christmas.

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
It's worse than that; Valentine's Day is designed to make you CONFORM. If you're single you should still buy cards and send them to your crush!

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] bibliophile1887.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:15 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] senor-biggles.livejournal.com
*steals soapbox, fashions it into a telephone booth with a heart on the side, presents it to [livejournal.com profile] snapesbabe*

=D

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 12:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
If you think I'm going in there and changing into superman you're going to be sadly disappointed...

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] senor-biggles.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 02:13 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 02:18 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] options3000.livejournal.com
I'm with ya. Another evil trick of the evil business empires!

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missdiane.livejournal.com
You know you're not going to get any disagreement from me with that vent.

I shall likely be wearing black on V-day, as is my tradition. Though interestingly instead of moping, I'm hoping to retain my current attitude - which yesterday I was laying claim to the hot new faculty member that's currently driving here from Florida by referring to him as "my boyyyfriend" LOL

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 01:58 pm (UTC)

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com
Love isn't as predictable and safe as that. It's not red heart shapes and fluffy kittens and roses; it's the inability to spend a second of your day without thinking about someone.

While I agree with your sentiment I don't agree with your statement. Its quite possible to love or be in love with someone without thinking about them every second of your day. I love my parents I feel not the need to be constantly talking about them for example - ditto my good friends. Certainly in the "honeymoon" period love has an almost obsessional cognitive hold on your thoughts (this is the time when a second won't go by without thinking about the object of your affections in a situtation of romantic love) however this doesn't generally last the duration of the relationship (even if the relationship lasts for your relative period of forever (until the day you die)). Love is safe and predictable if you ask me - or it becomes safe and predictable and a comfort as much as a romantic engagement - otherwise I think you are implying either people can't get on with their lifes because their neural pathways are blocked by thoughts of their significant other for the rest of their days... ;)

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
Or, because I'm female, I can think of more than one thing at once... ;)

I wasn't just talking about romantic love; there's barely a second of the day goes by when I'm not thinking about Shrubby.

Also "talking about" and "thinking about" are not interchangeable concepts.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:16 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:18 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:22 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:24 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:33 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:50 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:54 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] kcontheroad.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 06:49 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] endless-psych.livejournal.com - Date: Sunday, February 4th, 2007 08:07 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com
I agree with most of what you say. Commercialization of anything is something I think is bad and something that warps the underlying/original intention of whatever it was (or was supposed to be) in the beginning.

Aside from that I actually think Valentine's Day can be a good thing. A lot of people have busy lives and either can't or don't take the time to tell/show their loved one that they care by spending some quality time together.

I really enjoy valentine's day (even did when I was single). These days Valentine's Day is an opportunity for my significant other and I to dress to the nines and head out on the town, eat some fabulous food and spend the whole night together, talking and laughing and having fun; not worrying about anything but the connection we have with each other.

Could we do this on any day? sure. There's nothing stopping us. The thing about Valentine's day is that it's on *every* calendar you see, going "hey, even if you can only do this once a year, look, it's already scheduled for you".

I don't ask for or give presents on this day, I don't see this as the purpose or intention of Valentine's Day. The last time I gave something it was roses that I hand-made out of tissue paper from the grocery store and gave to all my friends.

It saddens me that so many single people think that they have to hate Valentine's Day, or that they are supposed to feel second class or something on that day. In my thoughts, as a single person, one ought to spend the day/evening having quality time with onesself or with one's friends. There are always people to make room to spend time with, it doesn't have to be someone with whom a sexual love is attached.

There is a lot wrong with our holidays as they have been commercialized by the business world; but that doesn't stop us from seeking to celebrate (or ignore, if that's what one thinks is more important) with the original intention.

This is all just my opinion, everyone else may feel differently and are encouraged and free to do so.

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
an opportunity for my significant other and I to dress to the nines and head out on the town, eat some fabulous food and spend the whole night together, talking and laughing and having fun; not worrying about anything but the connection we have with each other.

If I had someone with whom I wanted to do that sort of thing, I'd be doing it any day APART from Valentine's Day, out of an annoyance at being expected to conform to some societal schedule. LOL.

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:21 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] neohippie.livejournal.com
I agree with the sentiment that if you love someone, you should show it any time of year.

I also agree that silly cards and roses or singing teddy bears are probably not the best way to show it.

And of course I don't like how single people or people in bad relationships feel left out.

However, I disagree about the chocolates! If anyone wants to give me chocolates, for whatever reason, FEEL FREE! My favorites are Turtles or anything else with caramel, or that really really dark chocolate that's at least 70% cocoa, mmmmmm!

Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com
I'm just bitter because my intolerance to caffiene means that I can no longer eat chocolate...

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:24 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] miss-s-b.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:26 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] seridia.livejournal.com - Date: Friday, February 2nd, 2007 03:27 pm (UTC) - Expand

Date: Tuesday, February 6th, 2007 10:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pmoodie.livejournal.com
El and I generally ignore it.

I do sometimes make her a card, that way I'm not putting money into anyone's evil corporate pockets.

But I've just taken her to bleedin' Venice, so any other romantic nonsense I fling at her is going to pale by comparison!

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