stuff and nonsense

[miss_s_b]

In 2007, snapesbabe resolves to...

Backup my yorkshire regularly.
Be nicer to options3000.
Become a better qi.
Learn to play the wordplay.
Put fifty bottoms a month into my savings account.
Eat more innocent whistles.

Get your own New Year's Resolutions:

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa I just watched Van Helshit. You know next time I'm complaining about what a crap wanky jumped-up fanfic writer RTD is? Remind me about Van Helsing, won't you? Oh, it's the most beautifully designed atrocious film in the world ever. It seems that the quality of the film is inversely proportional to the size of the budget with Sommers. I mean, I still have a MASSIVE soft spot for Deep Rising, and The Mummy was watchable, but...

Apart from the gorgeous set design, lighting, costumes, etc, what's the one redeeming feature?

Five minutes of Sam West at the beginning doing his bestest Colin Clive impression (with straight hair - Woe!). He makes such a lickable mad scientist. Little bits of fringe flopping in his eyes FTW!

* fevered mutterings about jars of honey and stepladders *

Srsly, who cast Richard Roxburgh as Dracula? They want SHOOTING.

Still, thank you again to lovely Abi for giving me such pleasure this evening... five minutes of lusting and a couple of hours of disbelieving laughter have cheered me up no end :D

Comments

[pink-weasel.livejournal.com]

It's not so much Roxburgh that's terrible as THE THING ON HIS HEAD which is both utterly terrifying and also the most hysterically funny thing in the entire universe.

I am quite firmly convinced that Van Helsing is one of the greatest movies ever made.

[miss-s-b.livejournal.com]

It's the whole "lets completely rewrite every horror film EVER and smoosh them together and then put a guy in a bad wig who can't act in the lead role" thing that gets me... You would have thought that just ONE part of that plan might have struck SOMEBODY as being a bit off... Even Kate Beckinsale inna corset ain't going to make up for that.

Although I will be watching that first five minutes over and over again

[pink-weasel.livejournal.com]

It doesn't matter that Jackman can't act, he's pretty to look at. And it doesn't matter that they've taken good stuff and mashed it up and made it into a film of ridiculous insanity because it's joyfully entertaining!

I got the DVD for Christmas and will be gleefully playing it over and over and then I'm going to watch Carry on Screaming.

[miss-s-b.livejournal.com]

Oh, I meant Roxburgh. Dracula is SO the lead role LOL. Jackman CAN act, he was just given atrocious lines to act with in this...

[pink-weasel.livejournal.com]

I think Roxburgh can act, I just haven't seen him do much of it. He was marvellous in Moulin Rouge but completely awful in every single other thing I've ever seen him in. His Sherlock Holmes the other Christmas was terrible and he was upstaged by Bergerac anyway.

Jackman is lovely. I'm having Richard Armitage problems though, he may be wonderful to watch but I've just watched the interview with him on the Robin Hood bit of the BBC website and he's clearly such a numpty in real life I'm not sure I want to probe any deeper.

[ihavecake.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure I want to probe any deeper

*quickly volunteers to take over*

[miss-s-b.livejournal.com]

Well he certainly failed with the main aim for the character... unless "despise" and "lust after" are interchangeable terms these days?

[pink-weasel.livejournal.com]

Clearly they are the same. I don't think he's bright enough to realise the undulations of lust sweeping the nation. I noticed that if you look up any Robin Hood audios or dvd's or anything similar on Amazon they all have "customers who brought this also brought...*long list of non Robin Hood things all featuring Armitage*"