miss_s_b: (Fangirling: Lee)
I'm all electionned out, so I'm going to indulge myself today by talking about something else dear to my heart.

Those of you who have known me for some time, and know my proclivities when it comes to men, might have noticed that I have something of a type. Tall, geeky boys with deep voices and good legs. Men who can cook. Well-dressed, curly-haired men who look good in a beard and can pull off an outrageous hat. Men with a wicked, dry sense of humour; who look great in shiny boots but will wear slippers when nobody is looking. Men who lean bi, or at least are not bothered by being accused of such. Men who can wear a cravat. Men who can do a quizzical eyebrow.

This springs from a LOT of places, but not least of which is the fact that at the possibly somewhat precocious age of six I got REALLY into old horror movies. And the stalwarts of old horror movies* were three men, one of whom had his birthday yesterday, and the other two have it today.

Peter Cushing would have been 101 yesterday. At a mere dead-on-six-foot he's the shortest of the three, and he was certainly the slightest. He was an extraordinarily talented actor, and if you don't believe that you haven't seen his Winston Smith, which knocks old raddled-face Hurt into a cocked hat.

Peter Cushing always looked stunning in whatever he was wearing**, partly due to poise, and partly due to cheekbones you could slice steel with. I believe he is a large part of my fondness for men in suits, especially a good three piece.

The thing that I admire most about The Cush, though, is that everybody seems to have had a very deep and genuine affection for him - even that grumpy old Tory Sir Lee (of whom more later), who was his best friend and co-Sylvester the Cat impersonator from 1957 till the day that he died. He was a Proper Gentleman, always unfailingly polite to everybody from the tea lady to the Queen. This is something I could probably learn from.

Vincent Price was the most impish of the three, and also by far the most political. He would have been 103 today. He was huge friends with Kenny Everett***, campaigned against racism and sectarianism, and built and endowed the Vincent And Mary Price Art Museum at East LA college because of his firm belief in public access to great art. He adored his doggies, especially Joe, whom he loved so much he wrote a book about him****.

He was also a fabulous cook. I know this because (thanks to [personal profile] karohemd) I have one of his cookbooks. Because of the era it was written in, it has the same approach to healthy eating that I was brought up with - i.e. everything contains lots of butter, cream, and alcohol. Now that I am reasonably close to my target weight I look forward to trying more recipes from it.

Christopher Lee is the baby of the three, at a mere 92 today. What can I say about the grumpy old sod that I haven't said a thousand times before? Although in social terms I probably would have got on better with Cushing, and certainly in political terms I would have got on better with Price, Lee is the one whose voice goes directly to the forelock-tugging peasant genes in me and makes me sag at the knees and wish to serve, and I mean that in a deeply sexual way.

I have a spotify playlist called "Christopher Lee Reads Stuff". When [personal profile] magister is playing Lego The Hobbit on his playstation he calls me into the room for the cut scenes because Sir Lee narrates them. Christopher Lee's voice has had a very profound effect on me from the first moment I heard, at the tender age of six, they have destroyed my servant; they shall be destroyed. For all the stuff I talk about above, this is the biggie. Men with deep, commanding voices are my kryptonite, and Sir Lee is their king.

So yeah. In terms of genuine admiration that comes from judgment in my brain, Price probably just beats Cushing but they are both up there. In terms of instinctive reaction that I have no control over whatsoever? Yet to meet a man that can do with his entire soul and being what Christopher Lee can do with a single whispered syllable*****.

Here is Sir Lee talking about his two best mates. Enjoy:



I shall certainly be raising a glass to the three of them later.



* or at least the ones that I obsessively recorded on our Video2000 video recorder that they showed late night on the BBC.
** seriously, even as a tramp in fingerless gloves for Doctor Terror's House of Horrors the man radiates style.
*** yes, this almost certainly does mean what you think it means.
**** if you ever have an afternoon to spare and feel like one of those feel-good books that makes you laugh and cry in equal measure, I fully recommend The Book of Joe by Vincent Price, by the way.
***** although I can think of a couple who come close. You know who you are.

On Consent

Saturday, January 25th, 2014 11:58 am
miss_s_b: (Mood: Facepalm)
I thought, it appears foolishly, that consent was a simple thing. If you wish to physically interact with another person, you get their informed enthusiastic consent before doing so. This did not seem to me to be controversial. After the news stories and the reactions thereto of the last couple of weeks, I'm not so sure. So here is a very basic primer on consent for the hard-of-thinking.
  1. If you wish to interact physically with another person, ask them first.

  2. Ask as specifically as possible, so there are no misunderstandings about what is (or is not) being consented to.

  3. Consent does not have to be verbally explicit, but that does not mean that you can assume it's there. If in doubt ask, don't assume.

  4. Consent can be stopped or withdrawn at any time, and if it is stopped or withdrawn you stop what you are doing immediately.

  5. If they say no to anything you suggest, that is not consent.

  6. If they look horrified, move away, can't maintain eye contact, or otherwise display a lack of enthusiasm for the prospect, that is not consent.

  7. If they are too drunk/stoned/otherwise incapacitated to know what they are doing, that is not consent.

  8. If they are dressed in a particular way, that is not consent.

  9. If consent is given in response to some threat you have issued or implied, or any other form of duress, that is not consent.

  10. If you have had consenting physical interaction with a person before, this does not imply that future physical interactions are automatically consented to, nor does it give you a free pass to escalate interactions to new heights.

  11. If you are unsure about whether or not consent has been given, err on the side of caution and don't do anything. If the person you wish to interact with is enthusiatic about interacting with you, they will let you know.
None of that strikes me as being particularly difficult. It's about respecting another person's right to determine what happens to them. The fact that some people struggle with this is profoundly depressing to me. Surely physical contact is better when all parties are happy and enthusiastic about it happening?

ETA: inevitably the first response to this (on twitter) was "But what about x, y and z situations?". There is a reason I put "very basic" at the top of this post. Obviously there are situations in long-standing relationships or BDSM play where some of these rules need to be applied more flexibly. I would contend, however, that (just to pluck a random example out of the air) in the bar at Lib Dem conference with people you do not know well and don't have an existing relationship with, all of the above needs to be cast iron.
miss_s_b: (Who: Dalek porn)
There are people in this world who like to be nannied. To turn their brains off and let other people do the thinking. To let someone else make all the decisions and have everything handed to them on the plate. These people are traditional statist Labourites.

There are people in this world who like taking orders. Who like the smack of firm Tory Government.

Good luck to both those sets of people. I'm a Liberal, I don't understand them, but I can dig that that's what they like. It's not what I want, though.

I want hot sexy liberalism, pure and unsullied by authoritarian bullshit. And by Cthulhu I'm lucky enough to know lots of people who want to give it to me. I'm a lucky, LUCKY girl.

*grin*
miss_s_b: (Innuendo: cybersex)
I am quite willing to believe that some sex workers are exploited, coerced, and mistreated. Human trafficking is a terrible thing, and should be stamped out. Modern slavery likewise. But when somebody says that the ONLY reason for a sex worker to go into sex work is coercion and/or desperation, that makes me a bit uncomfortable to say the least.

The idea that no woman (because when people say this, it IS usually about women) could go into sex work voluntarily springs from some very sexist (and quite modern) assumptions:
  1. Women do not like sex as much as men*
  2. Therefore if a woman Does It with a man she must be doing it for some reason other than enjoyment
  3. Love is an acceptable reason, money isn't
You all know how I hate it when we are treated as members of our group first and individuals second, so I'm not going to labour that point, but... some people have high sex drives, some people have low sex drives, and those things are not always congruent with gender.

It is entirely possible that some women go into sex work voluntarily, and enjoy it when they get there. In fact, more than possible, it's true; you can find myriad testimonies from such women on the internet and elsewhere. And to dismiss them with "oh well they don't know what they are saying", which is normally the next step for people who think all sex workers are coerced? Surely I don't need to point out how patronising and sexist THAT attitude is?

TL;DR version: I am a sex positive feminist and I don't think feminists who aren't know what they are talking about.



*Anyone who thinks all women have lower sex drives than all men needs to be introduced to me, and then to have a gentle chat with some of my partners, only one of whom comes anywhere close to having my general level of sex drive.
miss_s_b: (Mood: pervy)
So we're just getting to the end of National HIV testing week, and as I said in my post the other day part of being responsibly poly is not just to play safe, but to get yourself regularly tested. I last got tested for everything as part of the huge numbers of tests they did for my mystery abdominal pain* in May, so it's been about 6 months. So today I went to get tested. I suspect that this is another one of those posts people will accuse me of being "brave" for writing. As usual, I'm not being brave, I'm doing something necessary.

I can't talk about what it's like for boys, because my equipment is different, but I can go into gory detail about what it's like for girls under the cut )

Some of the swabs might get parcelled up to be sent away; some of them might be tested right there and then. I suspect this depends entirely on the facility you get tested at. In terms of my tests today three were done while-u-wait and the rest I have to phone up for in a couple of weeks.

And that's it. I'm not going to try and claim that it's fun, but it's not that bad, and it's necessary.


*Still mysterious, but the surgical adhesion theory seems to hold water because the pain is mostly gone since I lost over a quarter of my body mass...
**Other high risk groups include men who have had sex with other men and anyone who has had sex with filthy foriegners, as well as the ones everybody thinks of like sex workers.
***YAY for knowing everybody who has drunk in a pub in the lower valley the last 15 years
****seriously, one of my funding priorities for the NHS would be astroglide. Even if most people don't bother going for sexual health screening, half the population has to have smear tests on a regular basis...
*****thrush is not actually an STI per se; although it can be sexually transmitted, most of the time it just develops all by its own sweet self. But when you go for sexual health screening makes sense for them to check for that while they're down there.
miss_s_b: (Pratchett: Nanny Ogg)
People seem to find the technical language around politics in general and LibDemmery in particular to be slightly confusing. With that in mind I thought a glossary might be useful; this post is meant to be taken entirely seriously and is in no way humourous or mere gratuitous filth.possibly there are some of you who don't want to see this )

Happy to amend the list with any suggestions from readers which are appropriate and sensible. Remember folks, Lib Dems do it with a Focus you won't believe ;)
miss_s_b: (Who: Six (ot3))
I've been pondering how to write about this on and off all day. Then I saw what Jazz Hands Srs Bznss had written and I thought:Why bother? I'm not going to do a better post than that.

So go and read Dave's post. And then think on, and try not to participate in bi-erasure.

(or, you know, any other form of erasure or exclusion. Cos they're bad).
miss_s_b: (Mood: Gorgeous)
Having spent several days now shuttling between a bit miserable and the depths of despair, which my medication is barely denting and a trip to the doctor hasn't really helped, something has happened today which has given me a spike of genuine happiness.

I don't generally like the Sun. It makes my skin fall off and makes me all sweaty and dries my garden out and makes my doggies panty. But it does have one welcome effect.

[personal profile] matgb is wearing shorts. Phwooooooooor.
miss_s_b: (Mood: Lustful)
I am v busy at the mo, but I just wanted to mention one thing: aside from my name, my top search term over the last month has been Stephanie Flanders Stockings. I am gratified to know that I am not the only pervert out there, but am slightly worried at the number of people searching for that search term. Unless, of course, it's one person searching for it several times per day, who is going to get ever so excited that I have a new entry with his/her favourite search term included in it...

I wonder if anyone has told Ms. Flanders?

OK, now back to the designign and such. Laters!



My March sponsor is Mark Reckons.
miss_s_b: (Mood: Vyvyan Twos Up)
Yesterday was fun. I did a full shift at work, and then went to my friend Reenie's 50th birthday party. Reenie is a lesbian, and lots of her friends are lesbians. I reckon there were about five blokes in the whole place. I did lots of dancing, and a reasonable amount of drinking, and there was some kissing and cuddling too. It was really nice to be in an atmosphere and a place where I felt completely unjudged and unwary about what people might think of me for being bi and having odd hair and all that sort of thing.

This morning has been less fun. I finally got around to filling in my candidature forms for being a council candidate. Hopefully I will be approved. This will mean that in May people might get to vote for me. It's a prospect I approach with some trepidation: the minutiae of my life are all on the internet for anyone to see, and I suspect that somewhere I have said unwise things that an opponent could try to make political capital from. Plus, you know, the whole bi/poly/open thing. I'm by no means ashamed of my lifestyle, but it might not necessarily make good headlines in the local rag... Still, we shall see how it goes.

Oh well, another eight hour shift to do today, but then day off tomorrow...



My March sponsor is Mark Reckons, who has tagged me in a meme which I will do later.
miss_s_b: (TG: LLCoolJ)
I have added a word to my profile. It appears to be a nealogism. I'd like to see it adopted into the language. To me, a cad is someone a bit devil-may-care. The type of man who wears a cravat, and has a Beard of Evil TM; he drives a classic Jag, and never, EVER puts ice in his single malt whisky. He's not evil, exactly, but he doesn't have traditional morals. He's naughty.

Oh yes, I'm definitely a Cadophile.



My March sponsor is Mark Reckons, who isn't caddish at all, but I don't hold that against him.
miss_s_b: (Fangirling: Sam West)
Why did no-one tell me that Helo is in Dollhouse? Because, you know, HELO!



I'm going to have to frigging watch it now...



This blog is proudly sponsored by
miss_s_b: (Innuendo: cybersex)
I don't think I have ever officially come out as bi. There ought to be some sort of ceremony or something, with respect to David's eloquent opinions. Instead it's just been casually dropped into enough conversations that word got around and now everyone knows. To be honest, I feel like kind of a fraud even typing this. I'm cisgendered, I'm in a very happy and committed (albeit open) heterosexual relationship, both of which facts allow me to pass for normal to anyone who doesn't want to scratch below the surface (and most people don't). Therefore I have never faced the kind of bald prejudice that a lot of my gay, or bi-but-in-same-sex-relationship, or trans friends have. I am comfortable in my sexuality, and most people who I spend time with (including customers in the pub, to my somewhat-surprise) don't seem bothered at all; or at least, if they are, they don't show it in front of me.

If only everyone had it as easy as I have.

I'll continue to try to do my bit to make sure that one day, everyone will.



This blog is proudly sponsored by
miss_s_b: (Blogging: Dreamwidth/LJ - Make Love Not )

Fresh Squeezings from the veins of the internet!

  • Pride Central! Gay-pride.org.uk is a central resource for finding out about pride events local to you.

  • London Pride! Today is, of course, Pride Day for those of you who live in That London. Have fun, if you're going, and if you see a really gorgeous mixed race girl in devil horns, give her a smile, for she is [personal profile] ginasketch.

  • Bi Pride! [personal profile] djm4 has an excellent post on what bisexuals really want.

  • Lib Dem Pride! Daddy Alex's post about the difference between Labour and Lib Dem stances on equal rights for those of different sexual orientations seems curiously salient today.

  • Self-determination Pride! I love you, Pterry. You rock.
And today's Meme:

Your result for The Kinsey-n-Klein Orientation Test...

Kinsey - 2

Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally.
You could be straighter. You're like a rubber eraser. You might look solid but you are a bit more flexible than average. You have a leaning towards members of the opposite sex but generally you love people across the board.

Take The Kinsey-n-Klein Orientation Test at HelloQuizzy





This blog is proudly sponsored by
miss_s_b: (Default)
... even with his chest hair all full of toast crumbs and a crappy laptop on his knee, [livejournal.com profile] matgb is still sexy and gorgeous.
miss_s_b: (Default)
I squicked teh [livejournal.com profile] faeriecween! I squicked teh [livejournal.com profile] faeriecween!

* smug dance *

And all it took was mention of shagging in front of election night special and David Dimbleby just glancing over the top of his glasses at a crucial moment...
miss_s_b: (Default)
... two things.

1, On the way to the recording [livejournal.com profile] matgb and I picked up a freebie London paper. For reasons which needn't be gone into here he was spanking me with it at one stage. Then when we were in the drill hall it was on the floor at our feet... And Marcus Brigstocke picked it up. And read it. And then shoved it in Hugh Dennis's face, repeatedly. I therefore have in my possession a newspaper which has been in close physical proximity to my (clothed) bottom, and has been touched by Marcus Brigstocke's hands and Hugh Dennis's face. The bidding starts here.

2, Wearing the Forbidden Planet T-shirt was definitely a good idea. I got an impressed eyebrow raise and eye contact with Mitch Benn.

* fangirly swoon *

Also, Mitch was by FAR the funniest person there and doubtless half of his funniness will be cut.

* suspects that Mat will have something to say about that last with regard to Sue Perkins *

But yes, I laughed so hard my belly hurt and the company was great and I had eye contact with Mitch Benn. I am a very happy bunny.

And that's without even going into activities before the show, which I am sure you can all imagine, so I won't bore you with the detail but good god he's fantastic.

* feeble attempt at innocent expression *

From [profile] mrsbunnies

Monday, March 26th, 2007 09:22 pm
miss_s_b: (Default)
Not in front of the socks, Julian!



Lunch date turned into quite long ramble in the park and then trip to the pub and then drunken shopping in Sainers.

Sarah = bad influence.

Also, she has new BF and so we were having discussions which inevitably turned extremely filthy. And we're now planning to do internet shopping of the worst kind. Hurrah!

(and now she's teasing me about my dirty laugh. I can't help it! Yes, definitely a bad influence >:D )
miss_s_b: (Default)
Comment here with "top ten" or "top five" and I'll ask you to supply one. If you don't specify, you'll get a five.

And it's actually REALLY difficult. Because OBVIOUSLY there are lots of curly-haired men that I fancy, but there are curly-haired men that I admire for other reasons also, and that skews the results slightly...

click here for teh curly-haired goodness )

God, that was hard work. I had to go and look at random quest caps to calm myself down there... O:-)

ETA: Also, [livejournal.com profile] pmoodie asked me for my top five Bond Movie post mortem quotes:

1, It's not really post mortem, but... The bit in Live and Let Die - "Whose funeral is it?" "Yours!" *stab* *partay music*
2, "I think he got the point" (after shooting someone with a speargun)
3, "Take a giant step for mankind." (pushing Drax into an airlock)
4, "Shocking! Positively Shocking!" (Oddjob gets electrocuted)
5, "He always did have an inflated opinion of himself." (yes, I know, another one from Live and Let Die. Sorry. But it's my favourite!)

Hot Men picspam

Saturday, January 27th, 2007 08:47 pm
miss_s_b: (Default)
[livejournal.com profile] ginasketch tagged me to post pictures of my top ten celebrity crushes. I am declining, but only because I couldn't POSSIBLY restrict myself to ten (it was hard enough trimming them down to 15) and I aren't posting them in any particular order. click for hot sexy manflesh )
miss_s_b: (Default)
I ask merely because of the explosion of horribleness all over LJ today. Not just wangst, but real, genuine PAIN and heart-rending lifestuff.

That shit is supposed to be confined to February. Why is it coming early?

For those who need cheering up, especially those of you who, like me, have a thing for the curlier-haired gentleman, I'd like you to take a moment to think. Pause, and imagine the lovely Rufus Sewell. Imagine his naked bottom. Then click here* and see if your imagination matches up to the reality.

*If the words "naked" and "bottom" didn't give you a clue, it's almost definitely NSFW
miss_s_b: (Default)
... so very very wrong cut because I rather suspect it is and for spoilers for Midsomer Murders )

Yes, yes, sick and wrong and evil, I know.

Buffdays

Tuesday, January 16th, 2007 11:53 am
miss_s_b: (Fangirling: Sam West)
Happy Buffday to [livejournal.com profile] gilesgurl and the lovely James May.

I think I bit my tongue in my sleep. It has all painful lacerations on it. Woe. Could be something to do with the dreams I had last night.

Honestly, what do people expect when they tell me this?
"...Samuel West follows his parents, Timothy West and Prunella Scales, in appearing in Midsommer Murders. He plays Jeremy Thacker, a virgin in his 30s."
Cue lots of deflowering dreams.

* eyebrow waggle *

In other news, Shrubby has been watching Peppa Pig this morning and is now insisting on calling me "mummy pig"...
miss_s_b: (Fangirling: Sam West)
See, THIS is what I have to put up with. Is it any wonder I'm randier than Austin Powers faced with twins?

click here for a sample of naked!Sam West caps )

About This Blog

picture of Jennie Rigg

Hello! I'm Jennie (known to many as SB, due to my handle, or The Yorksher Gob because of my old blog's name). This blog is my public face; click here for a list of all the other places you can find me on t'interwebs.






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