miss_s_b: (Love: Dads are awesome)
[personal profile] miss_s_b
Had an SEN meeting with Holly's teacher yesterday. She's a very sensible lady, and has set some useful targets for Hol's social and behavioural development, and has been keeping records of her progress. The interesting thing is that, because Holly is now on the SEN register, they track her academic progress alongside the stuff she got put on for, because there's boxes for that and you have to fill in all the boxes.

Thus, yesterday, we found out that her reading age is 13.9 (she's 8) and she would be quite capable, academically, of going to senior school now.

I was talking to my cousin about this recently, and she works with primary school children. She is of the opinion that just like some people are bad at spelling, and some are bad at maths, being on the spectrum just means you're not so good at doing what most people expect in social situations. I do worry about Hol being medicalised, but I am supremely relaxed that her teacher is handling it in the most appropriate way.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 05:56 pm (UTC)
karohemd: by LJ user gothindulgence (Default)
From: [personal profile] karohemd
That sounds very positive indeed, especially the bit about Holly's reading age. I couldn't read or write before I started school (because I guess my parents thought they'd leave the teaching to the professionals) but I picked it up really quickly and then ate whole books for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 06:28 pm (UTC)
ginasketch: (smirk)
From: [personal profile] ginasketch
I love how it sounds like you're raising a genius supervillain.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 06:30 pm (UTC)
matgb: Artwork of 19th century upper class anarchist, text: MatGB (Default)
From: [personal profile] matgb
I think she plans on the hero side of things-Thunderous Fart Girl is her preferred moniker ;-)

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 06:32 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] magister
That could go either way to be honest.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 06:50 pm (UTC)
ginasketch: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ginasketch
ahahaha awesome.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 07:36 pm (UTC)
telegramsam: (boredsherlock)
From: [personal profile] telegramsam
...or Sherlock Holmes. Which would be awesome.

Just don't make her wear a deerstalker (unless she wants to).

I'm so glad she has a good teacher, that makes such a big difference.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 06:32 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] magister
I think academically, Hol's been capable of senior school level work for a while. I do think that her teacher's going about it very well - her attitude with Hol seems to be that it's not a question of Holly doing things wrong, rather that if she does things differently, then it'll be easier for her, which seems to link up to what your cousin says.

Things seem to have come on very fast in the last few years - Seamus had a lot in common with Holly when he was 8 going on 9 and was largely treated by the school as being a bloody nuisance. He's getting a lot more help now, but back then was bullied a lot, the school's response to which was that it was his own fault for not being what they thought of as normal.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 06:32 pm (UTC)
shishmish: (Comedy - BRAVO!)
From: [personal profile] shishmish
She nearly has the reading age of a 14 year old and she's only 8?! Damn, that's impressive.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 06:36 pm (UTC)
shishmish: (Doctor Who - Curse of Fatal Death)
From: [personal profile] shishmish
Good that you are passing on the book love, I can't wait to be able to do that with my own kids (whenever I have them). And I couldn't agree more with your icon ♥

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 07:04 pm (UTC)
leoniedelt: dunno whose this is (sherlock side glance)
From: [personal profile] leoniedelt
Sounds good.

Has Holly got a dx yet? No one can dx but a (developmental) paediatrician.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 07:50 pm (UTC)
leoniedelt: not sure whose this is (eleven trust me)
From: [personal profile] leoniedelt
The school cannot diagnose anything.

That is a massive, massive foboff :(

I've taken two girls through diagnosis, it has to be through a GP referral to a developmental paediatrician. No one else can do it (except a handful of psychologists privately)

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 07:52 pm (UTC)
leoniedelt: dunno whose this is (Default)
From: [personal profile] leoniedelt
There are. We have one for Bethany. They got involved because of the statutory assessment we started for her.

An ed psych cannot diagnose.

Only a developmental paediatrician can.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 08:00 pm (UTC)
leoniedelt: dunno whose this is (four timelord)
From: [personal profile] leoniedelt

Both of my girls were diagnosed through the multidisciplinary assessment at the Child Development Centre in Castle Vale. It was spearheaded both times by a developmental paediatrician and involved about 8 other professionals over two mornings. Rach was 3.5 at dx, Beth was 25 months.

Older children (school age) typically see just the developmental paediatrician and go through several tests - ADOS, ADI, 3DI, etc. The paed makes the diagnosis or not.

The educational psychologist is there to see what can be done to makew reasonable adjustments for the child in the educational setting, what needs s/he has wrt social situations, attainment levels, etc etc.

Definitely definitely chase it up. Shout if i can help (been there twice, and through one adult dx too)

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 07:52 pm (UTC)
leoniedelt: mine! all mine! (illya ahem)
From: [personal profile] leoniedelt
in particular it doesnt matter one single tiny bit what the school are doing - the school do 'education' - the paed/GP do 'health'. never the twain shall meet. One does not control or prevent the other.

In fact, once you have a diagnosis through the 3DI or ADOS and ADI, then the school will have more ammunition to do what they need to know knowing EXACTLY what the difficulties are.

Autism/ASD/Asperger's is a MEDICAL diagnosis, not an educational one.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 07:14 pm (UTC)
staceyuk: Funny Sherlock icon (Default)
From: [personal profile] staceyuk
Glad to here things are going well for her.

Date: Thursday, January 19th, 2012 09:48 pm (UTC)
ext_51145: (Default)
From: [identity profile] andrewhickey.info
Sounds very much like the way I grew up (my reading age was about the same at that age, and I was undiagnosed Asperger's). Hopefully if she's getting the proper attention she needs for her social stuff, she'll have a better time at school and university than I did and be able to make the most of her abilities.

And yes, she's got 'differences' rather than 'problems' with socialising. Seeing her on New Year's Day, she's obviously more than capable of holding her own in a conversation with several highly intelligent adults, some of whom she didn't know. That's not a lack of social skills, that's a set of social skills that are optimised for a different environment.

Date: Friday, January 20th, 2012 03:06 am (UTC)
sir_guinglain: (Default)
From: [personal profile] sir_guinglain
'Shrubbly' - lovely word.

I'm glad Holly's teacher seems sensible. I'm worried about medicalisation of non-standard social behaviour or educational attainment too (and looking at my cousins' children I'm worried by what is considered above average now, because it certainly wasn't thirty years ago). I had a reading age of 15 when I was 9, so that's roughly equivalent to Holly. We didn't have Asperger's diagnoses then, or at least not as part of the mainstream, though I certainly can be socially 'slower' than many others, for want of a better word.

Date: Friday, January 20th, 2012 10:22 am (UTC)
ext_392011: (Default)
From: [identity profile] rankersbo.wordpress.com
It's about aspergers... but it's also about Holly... but it IS about aspergers.

Trying to keep this brief and not wander off into a long, thoughtful, potentially baffling, philosophical essay.

My son, (Matthew, but I'll call him Obkersbo to stick with the convension of my own name), shows signs he may be on the spectrum. My wife desperately wants him to fit in and have friends- but... Part of me thinks he's different, not wrong. I'd like to make life easier, but not to the point where I'm saying who he is is a bad thing.

I know it's helping my son to improve his social skills, but I also feel a lot of the problems he may come across will be down to the intolerance of people who can't deal with people who are socially different. It's more realistic to teach Obkersbo to be able to cope with the world as it is, but part of me wants to stand up and make the world a nicer place, that's easier for him, Hol (and if I'm honest me). However much hassle taking a stand against unpleasantness has caused me in the past.

In short I don't want to be cruel to be kind.

Tell me if this doesn't make sense and I'll try and elaborate.

Anyway on this:

She is of the opinion that just like some people are bad at spelling, and some are bad at maths, being on the spectrum just means you're not so good at doing what most people expect in social situations

I would tend to agree, I mean I'd even go as far as saying it's stating the obvious rather than your cousin's opinion. My experience though is that people who are not good at various skills tend to normalise not being good at those skills and run down their significance. And at the same time they will overemphasise the importance of soft social skills.

Date: Monday, December 3rd, 2012 04:47 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Thanks for that nice, eloquent and thoughtful contribution. You ramble, but you're aware of the issues around what your son is going through, and those issues are very relevant to what Miss SB is going through. With such a nice, kind thoughtful dad on his side, your son has a lot going for him.

It must be great comfort for Miss SB to read such thoughtful and insightful words from another parent going through similar experiences.

Date: Tuesday, January 24th, 2012 02:12 pm (UTC)
guerabella: Snape's lips (Default)
From: [personal profile] guerabella
Good news, indeed. I'm glad your daughter has a teacher who understands. :)

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