miss_s_b: (Britishness: Tea)
It's taken me a couple of days to become coherent enough to type this up. We saw some features (CHUD being a particularly cheesy highlight) and shorts (Mortified was the best IMHO, but the shorts on Sunday were ALL good, technical issues with one of them notwithstanding) and ate some of [personal profile] matgb's home made cake and it was all good.

And we recorded little bits with both of the makers of short films who had come to the screenings, and they were both very cool. It was fun geeking about The Amicus Hand with Ashley Thorpe especially.

And then at some point before the screening of Whistle And I'll Come To You I was standing outside having a fag when a gentleman approached and lit up saying Aha! This is where the outcasts go... ... AND IT WAS SIR DR JONATHAN MILLER!!!!!eleventy!! And he chatted away quite amiably to me and [personal profile] magister on a range of subjects and was witty and interesting on all of them. And James and I went inside mumbling variations on a theme of OMG Jonathan Miller OMG and having geekgasms. And then the next time I went out for a fag it happened again!

Anyhew, to cut a long story short we secured his agreement to record a little bit for [community profile] mygoditsthebaggageman, which we did after his interview with Sir Professor Christopher Frayling (who is enough for geekgasms all by himself). I don't know how good or useful the recording is because my brain was basically in screamingOMG mode by the time I hit record, but I suspect that even if I am totally incoherent on it we'll be able to make something of it because the man can just talk about ANYTHING. I seem to recall us chatting about opera, German film, atheism, psychology, philosophy, sculpture, and many other things, but which of those I recorded I couldn't tell you.

The man has such a towering intellect, but he's so unpretentious with it. He is an absolute master of the fine art of not giving a flying fuck what anybody thinks about him, and I fully approve of that. Yeah, if you hadn't noticed yet, I was very, very impressed.

Oh yes, and apparently Madame Bovary is a tedious slut, and you might as well have a degree in stationery as media studies. And lots of things are drivel.

#FFWFest Day Two

Sunday, June 12th, 2011 12:13 am
miss_s_b: (Default)
The Plague of the Zombies

Classic Hammer cheese, set in a Cornish tin mine, with voodoo and Jacqueline Maximum Power!!!! Pierce and Michael Ripper and Andre Quatermas Morrell... The grey faces and the shambling and groaning are all a class above anything George A Romero ever did, and it's got a cheap workforce solution any Tory would be proud of. Gloriously sleazy performance from John Carson and a lovely climax.

Best bits? The zombies realising they are catching fire in the tin mine. Some classic zombie acting there.


The Hound of the Baskervilles

This was the BBC TV version with Peter Cushing (as opposed to the Hammer version with Peter Cushing) and felt like it was 80 minutes of script stretched out to 100 minutes. Holmes is absent for most of Baskerville, which works when you have a decent actor playing Watson. Unfortunately this doesn't have a decent actor playing Watson, and although Cushing is as excellent as ever, he's not in it enough to rescue it. And there was a glaring cock-up with the trains (don't ask) which is still annoying me now.

Best bits? Watson's sheep-shagger line, and the guy at the back of the audience quipping Shoulda gone to Specsavers when Stapleton falls into the Grimpen Mire.


Shorts: Suffer the Little Children

Every one of these was beautifully shot and lit. None of them had any real technical or quality issues. The scripts, though, varied enormously. The Happy Children was simple and atmospheric, but I was expecting a nastier ending - 6/10. Darkness Within possibly would have worked if even one of the characters had been in any way likeable, but I struggled to care about the suffering of the irritatingly smug husband and his voiceless wife - 3/10. Endless had the germ of a clever idea, but you have no idea of the relationship between any of the characters or what brought them to the point they were at. And the title felt appropriate by the time it ended. It dragged... - 3/10. Intercambio was dull and sexist and made no sense - 1/10. But then we got Click... And that was brilliant. The characters felt like real people doing the sort of things real people do, and the child actors were all excellent. I recommend you seek it out, if you can - 9/10.

The final film of this segment was The Elemental, which was nicely atmospheric with some creative shock moments and a great performance from the central actress - 7/10.

Best bits? Click, the whole of it.

Twins of Evil

A nice nuanced performance from Cushing makes this Hammer Ooo we've got twins who are willing to get their tits out film feel much higher quality than it otherwise might.

Best bits? The prison guard with the most impressive combover the world has ever seen, and Cushing's totally serious delivery of the line Satan has sent me twins... OF EVIL!!


Vincent Price Rarities Double Bill

The first half of this was a Parky-style interview with Vincent conducted by David Del Valle called The Sinister Image. I'd never seen it before, and learned a couple of new things from it, and mostly came away with the impression that Vincent was happy and relaxed and humorous about himself and his career. It was clear that he and David got on with each other and they were chatting like old friends. It was somewhat frustrating that every bit of Vincent's career got skated over very briefly, rather than a few choice bits gone into in depth, but I suspect that was always going to be the case. 6/10

The second half was An Evening With Edgar Allen Poe. I had seen it before, but I don't think many people there had. The format is basically a one-man reading of some of Poe's short stories, with some props and make-up, but nobody there other than Vincent. The first, Tell-Tale Heart, is the best, and I have only seen it bettered once (by Sean Pertwee, in this). Cask of Amontillado is also excellent. The whole thing is more of a stage, or even radio, play than TV/film, but it works because Price has the presence to carry it.

Best bits? VILLAINS! DISSEMBLE NO MORE! etc. 8/10
miss_s_b: (Fangirling: Don Warrington)
I had the feeling this year was going to be a good one watching all the excited tweets from people I didn't know on twitter. There was a real buzz in the museum when we were queueing to pick up our passes, and we ran into lots of people we knew. The air of excitement as we went into the first film was palpable.

Bloodbath at the House of Death

This is a very very silly film, written by Barry Cryer and starring a wealth of British comedy talent - John Fortune and Pamela Stephenson - and has Vincent Price in intentionally over the top ham mode. None the less it also has some very effective horror touches too, not always played for laughs. I liked it very much, and from the giggles and cheers throughout the film, so did everybody else.

Best bits were the musical joke, the Alien joke, and the sensitively portrayed (no, seriously) gay relationship between the very sexy Don Warrington and Gareth Hunt.


Horror Express

If you don't know how much I love this film by now you've not been paying attention. One of the joys of the FFW is that I am joined by like-minded people in a party atmosphere in a lovely cinema. There was cheering and applause throughout the film, and laughter and reciting of lines too. It was glorious.

Best bits? Oh, At your age, I'm not surprised, PEASANTS!, Monster? But we're British! and of course My God! It's the baggage man!... The cod science, zombie Telly Savalas, Christopher Lee Action Hero of Many Weapons, and the fct that everyone in the film only knows one tune... I could go on about this film forever.


Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires

The print the museum has obtained of this was beautiful. There was the odd scratch, and one scene was a bit yellow-hued, but mostly it was superb. I have never had the full widescreen big screen experience of this before, and again, the audience bursting into spontaneous applause added to the atmosphere. If you've never seen this film you really should; it's a Kung Fu Vampire movie with Peter Cushing in it. What more recommendation do you need?

Best bits? The very accomplished martial artist lady, and giggling at the Definitely Not Christopher Lee Dracula.

Peter Sasdy in Conversation with Tony Earnshaw

I wasn't entirely sure what to expect from this; I am a big fan of some of Sasdy's output (Taste the Blood of Dracula and The Stone Tape in particular) but I knew nothing about the man himself. He turned out to be witty, urbane, and charming. He had the audience eating out of his hands within minutes, and the lovely Mr Earnshaw was just giving the odd prompt, but mostly letting him talk.

Best bits? I got to ask a question about The Stone Tape and he gave me lots of attention and engaged with what I had said and gave a fuller answer to my question than I could have hoped for, and flattered me with two thumbs up and telling me that I had made him ant to watch the DVD with my enthusiasm. Sadly, due to transport issues we had to leave before he finished (stupid buses).


Not a duff moment all day. Was great chatting to old friends, and the program was very entertaining. I loved the feature that seems to have been extended this year: you know how when you go to the cinema you get adverts and trailers? Well this year more than ever at the FFW we are getting adverts and trailers from the era that the films are from, and it's really adding to the pleasure of it, embedding one into the atmosphere before the film even starts. I only wish we could have stayed for the midnight screening of the Exorcist, but apparently it's packed out, which is very happy-making :D

I am really looking forward to tomorrow :D
miss_s_b: (Gashlycrumb Tinies)
You might have gathered over the past few days that I am a big fan of the FFW. It's something I look forward to every year. Next year is the festival's tenth birthday, and as such it ought to be a doozy. The thing is, the FFW is not guaranteed to happen; if there isn't enough public demand then there's no point in the museum spending all that money to put the event on. So we need to make sure that the museum know the demand is there...

Now, I know that lots of readers of this blog are fans of genre films. But how many of you would be willing to travel to Bradford to see them? Are there any films which would have you leaping on a train with gay abandon?

Leave a comment to this entry and I will make sure Tony, the festival director, sees it. Or send the man himself an email - tony DOT earnshaw AT nationalmediamuseum DOT org DOT uk.

My suggestions include Ginger Snaps (feministy werewolf films FTW!), Dark City (Rufus Sewell's bum!), The Tingler (with or without seat modifications) and The Blob. I also think it would be cool to do something with Doctor Who - perhaps one of the Peter Cushing films (Dalek Invasion of Earth has genre favourites Cushing and Andrew Keir in, and would capitalise on interest in the current series).

What films/events would attract YOU?

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miss_s_b: (Who: ZOMG!)
I went in to Bradford just before 12 on Sunday to meet an old friend and fellow FFWer for lunch. Lunch was in The City Vaults, and it was good, and there was beer and conversation. And more beer. And giggling. And impressions of Christopher Lee. And non-sequitur quotes from Babe. And in the end my schedule went out of the window, and I didn't get into the actual museum until it was time for The Living Dead at the Manchester Morgue.

Tony introduced this with an anecdote about horror film geekery that touched a nerve with all of those listening, I think, and then a long list of heartfelt thanks to all the team behind the festival. I'd like to join him in that, especially the front of house staff who put up with us weirdoes clogging up their museum for the weekend - props to Jeni and Tristan in particular.

The film itself was one I hadn't seen before. I found the leading man needlessly irritating, and the leading lady needlessly weedy, but there were enough amusing moments to overcome this for me. The zombies lurched with a surprising turn of speed, and the body-part-munching was hilarious. There were some fabulous lines, and some amusing set-piece moments. It was a reasonalbe film to end the festival on, and I'm glad I saw it.

Conclusions then?

Well, this year wasn't the best one I have been to, but I've been to nearly all of them, so that's a tad unfair. Could have done with more sci-fi, and a broader range of films in general. But it was still the best way to spend a weekend I can think of. It was lovely to see the boys from the horror forum, and lots of other old friends, and it was great to see some films I have seen before, and a few I hadn't.

Film of the Festival: Arbeit Fur Alle, which was utterly, utterly fabulous.
Annoyance of the festival: staying for Birdemic, and having to pay £15 for a taxi home afterwards, when it was AWFUL.
Moment of the festival: the annual Monster? But we're British! chorus.
Winner of the annual "Which Film Will James Break a Seat During" sweepstake: Nobody. He broke it in the pub instead.

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miss_s_b: (Yorksher)
I took the decision on Saturday to go and see the Make-up Ladies in the museum foyer rather than braving the stairs to TV Heaven. One of them kindly slashed my wrist for me:

... and Debi got taught to do her own stab wound. And then it was time for Horror Express.

What can I say about Horror Express that hasn't been said a thousand times before? I firmly believe it is the best film ever made. It was wonderful watching the reactions of [personal profile] innerbrat and [livejournal.com profile] purple_pen, who hadn't seen it before. It was glorious hearing all the familiar classic lines (My God! It's the Baggage Man! Monster? But we're BRITISH! and of course the wonderful exchange Miss Jones, I shall need your assistance Well, at your age,I'm not surprised! *shocked*With an autopsy! *cheerfully excited*Oh, well, that's different!). It's the film that has everything a genre fan could ever want. It's got Cushing 'n' Lee. It's got a mad monk. It's got sci-fi, and victorian trains, and hairy-handed monsters, and boiled eyeballs, and brain pudding and Zombie Kojak. It's got amazing facial hair and silly hats galore. It's got the worst chat-up line ever. It's got a whistlable theme tune. Iy even has reasonable gender balance, given that it's a seventies horror film. If you haven't seen it before, get the DVD. And if you haven't seen it on the big screen before, come to the FFW next year, because Tony knows he'll get lynched if he doesn't show it.

The Giant Spider Invasion was an enjoyable slice of silly monster hokum, starring Della Street from Perry Mason as a lady scientist, lots of lovely Mexican RedKnee Tarantulas, and a huge, hilarious, animatronic spider. It did exactly what it said on the tin.

Screentalk with Michael Armstrong (excerpts on Youtube here) was pretty interesting, apart from the fact that I kept looking at him and thinking this is what [personal profile] po8crg is going to look like in 30 years' time. It was followed by a screening of his film Mark of the Devil, which... well, I didn't enjoy much. Aside from the discovery that Udo Keir was stunningly gorgeous in his youth, the film offered little in the way of revelations. Yes, people torture each other in horribly nasty ways. Yes, mob mentality makes people do stupid things. But I don't necessarily need to see an unrelenting exposé of these practises on film.

Which brings me on to Birdemic: Shock and Terror... And the reason this blog post has taken me two days to contemplate before writing it is because Birdemic: Shock and Terror is, without question, the worst film I have ever seen. Not in a so-bad-it's-good way. Not in an ironic way. Not in a funny way. It's a masterclass in how not to make a film. The script was awful, the acting was atrocious, the sound editing was abysmal, the lighting was ridiculous, the direction was pedestrian and clichéd, the characters were not even one dimensional, and the special effects were only special in the sense of special school (and I say that as a person with a diagnosed mental illness). It made the films of Ed Wood look filled with Kubrickian attention to detail. It made me nostalgic for the Citizen Kane-like storytelling and subtlety of Timeslash. If you are a connoisseur of truly bad films, you should see this if only so that you can see how bad a truly bad film can be. But don't say I didn't warn you how truly, utterly terrible it is.

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miss_s_b: (Fangirling: Judge Death)
Century Falls confirmed me in my opinion of Russel T Davies. He has some bloody good ideas, but doesn't half string them together badly. It was nice to have a not-standardly-pretty female lead, and lots of female secondary characters. It passed the Bechdel Test with flying colours. But the dialogue was awful.

The Short films were something of a mixed bag. The Image was total bobbins, but vaguely interesting because it had David Bowie in it. The Cicerones was very atmospheric and felt very League of Gentlemen, but ultimately lacked a payoff. The Island had amazing sound design, but no story, and finished with a remake of the scene from the end of Red Dwarf: Better than Life, so all I could think was Our faces have been smeared with jam and we're about to be eaten alive by killer ants!!! which made me giggle rather than feel the fear. Killer Display clearly wanted to have Peter Cushing in it as the shopkeeper, and was OK. Salvage was a mash-up of Aliens, Event Horizon and lots of other space horror films, and involved much of the same team as Killer Display. Again, it was OK. I suspect that Joey Wong, in particular, is a name we're going to be seeing more of in future.

What to say, then, about the only remaining short film Arbeit Fur Alle (Full Employment)? Oh, it was amazing. It is certainly the best short film I have seen at one of these festivals since The Telltale Heart animation. I could pick holes: the solitary female character is a screamer who needs rescuing, for example. But I really don't want to because it was so utterly, magnificently awesome. I ain't going to spoil it for you, which means I am not going to post the trailer I found on YouTube because it's spoilerific, but if you get the change to see the whole thing, you really should. It's fabulous.

Next up for me was Matthew Hopkins: Witchfinder General. I've seen it before, obvs, being a huge Vinny P fan, but never on the big screen. It's not a standard Vincent Price film. Aside from the Wilfrid Bramble's cameo (Witchfinder are you? Oooo that's nice), not one frame of it is played for laughs. It's a harrowing proper horror film. Price's performance is the antithesis of, say, Theatre of Blood - he dials it right down, and does actual proper acting. He plays an unrelenting cold-eyed murdering sociopathis rapist, and it's very unsettling. If you're a genre fan and you get the chance to see this on the big screen you totally should.

We ended the day with Psycho. Again, this is a film I am very familiar with but had never seen on the big screen. Before the film itself we were treated to an original trailer, in which Alfred Hitchcock gave us a tour of the set and was totally playing it for laughs. And then the film itself... The print was absolutely beautiful; a crisp, clean digital print. I'm not going to go into the story because everybody knows it, but seeing it in a cinema as it was meant to be was an immense experience. Hitchcock is an absolute master at drawing you in and messing with your head, and this is one of his best films. Anthony Perkins is brilliant as Norman, but there's not really a dud performance in it. The music is jarring and effective. The camerawork and lighting are stellar... It fully derserves it's reputation as a classic of the genre.

Let's see, then, what today brings...

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miss_s_b: (Self: SB the pervy six fancier)
So, if any of you are wondering where I am going to be at any point over the next three days, here is a handy schedule for you to stalk me:

Friday 4th June 2010

15.40 Century Falls (TV Heaven)
16:45 FFW 2010 Short Films
18:45 Matthew Hopkins Witchfinder General
20:30 Psycho

Saturday 5th June 2010

13.20 Raven (TV Heaven)
13:45 Horror Express YAAAAAAAAAAAY!
15:45 The Giant Spider Invasion
18:15 Screentalk: Michael Armstrong
20:15 Mark of The Devil
23:59 Midnight Screamer: Birdemic

Sunday 6th June 2010

12.00 Captain Scarlet & the Mysterons (TV Heaven)
12.40 Timeslip (TV Heaven)
13.20 Dark Season (TV Heaven)
14.00 Children of the Stones (TV Heaven)
14.40 Spooky Animation from the Archives (TV Heaven)
15:15 The Sorcerers
16:45 Videodrome
18:30 Screamtime
20.20 Alice in Wonderland (IMAX) OR 20:45 The Living Dead at Manchester Morgue

I am quite impressed that this year there is only one clash that I can't decide over, and that's right at the end. So I still have two and a half days to decide which one of the two I am going to go for... I am really looking forward to seeing old friends today. I suspect there may be beer at some stage. Will I be seeing YOU there?

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miss_s_b: (Self: boobies)
Last night, as part of the FFW, there was a screening of a film called The Scar Crow, and a Q&A session with cast and crew afterwards. The film had great effects and was beautifully and creatively shot, especially given the tiny budget and shooting timescale, but it just REEKED of misogyny. I can't give specifics without spoilers, but I had many, many problems with the film. Now, you can say this about a lot of films, including many that I really love. But the classic Hammer/Amicus/etc. films get something of a pass due to being made 30, 40, 50 years ago. This film was made last year. The ONLY named female characters were "evil", apart from the "sympathetic character" - i.e. the one who deserves a Well Done For Not Being A Rapist Cookie - 's girlfriend, who was merely peripheral AND stupid. There's an incestuous "lesbian" kiss, which the director stated in the Q&A he had put in because his 12 year old son had asked for some hot lesbo action.

And you know what?

Even as I type this I can feel the internet's reaction to me criticising the film for these reasons. It's just one film - it's not systemic. Not all films are like that! - just like not all men are like that. Well, YOU might have been offended, but I wasn't, and therefore it's not a problem. So you're saying we ought to ban films with hot lesbo action/films with female bad guys/etc. I thought you were a liberal?

etc. etc. et fucking cetera.

It's not just systemic in horror (and yes, I DID have an audible intake of breath when the director claimed to have been subverting expectations by shooting a gore flick with evil women and hot lesbo action in it). It's not just systemic in films. It's not just endemic in entertainment. It's endemic in life.

Are we all ready for the chorus of Oh, you're exaggerating! I don't know anyone who finds this a problem, girls? Boys, I hate to break this to you, but perhaps nobody has told you they find this sort of shit a problem because they know what your reaction will be. Do you ever find yourself thinking well harrassment/sexual assault/rape can't be that much of a problem because I don't know anyone who has been harrassed/assaulted/raped? I bet you a tenner that you do. For starters, if you know me, you do.

And do you know what? Even with all that said, I wouldn't want to ban films like this. I'd just like to live in a world where I can make this sort of criticism without having to pre-emptively defend myself against accusations of being a strident whinging harpie. I'd settle for that, but it'd be even nicer if I could go and see a gore flick where it's the men who are relentlessly objectified, and the women who are held forth as praiseworthy for not being rapists... Not because I think reverse discrimination is in any way the way forward, but just because it would be SUCH a fucking novelty.

Using the icon I have is a defensive action too. It's saying I know that women are objectified on the basis of their bodies, and I know it happens to me, and I can cope with it. It's saying I realise that I am part of the problem here. It's saying look, even though I have been raped, I have a sense of humour about stuff like this.

Yeah, I'm in a really good mood today.

Thanks to [personal profile] puddingcat for pointing me at most of the articles I link to.

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miss_s_b: (Fangirling: Cthulhu the Six!Fan)
Has been fabulous. As those of you who have been following my squeeful tweets will know. Bradford getting declared city of film really kicked things off with a bang, Flash on the big screen was amazing, even if the sound could have been better. Madhouse was hilarious. Satanic Rits of Dracula was... well, it was Satanic Rites of Dracula. The Short films were great this year, and featured a cameo from festival director Tony Earnshaw as a zombie (Note to self: get revenge on him for pulling my hair)... And then tonight was a GORGEOUS 70mill print of Aliens. Which, you know, I'm for Ridley Scott over James Cameron, but Aliens has Newt and Vasquez and pisses all over the Bechdel test.

And there's still a day to go :D

Seriously, folks, if you're anywhere near Bradford come on over for the Sunday. It's the most fun you can have with your clothes on.

And while you're there, pick up a "what would you like to see next year" form when you get your tickets and put Dark City on it for me. ;)
miss_s_b: (Default)
The United Nations has declared Bradford the world's first city of film. This is in part, of course, because Bradford hosts the National Media Museum, where I will be going today for one of their four yearly film festivals, the Fantastic Films Weekend. The NMM boasts the only cinema in the world which can play EVERY type of film print, from ancient black and white silents to three strip Cinerama, to Europe's first (and best) IMAX screen. I am very lucky to live so close to it, and am proud of the fact that I have a Friends of Film card and support the museum on a regular basis. It helps, of course, that the museum supports me in my geekery ;)

Find out more about the city of film award here, here, here, and here.
Find out more about the Fantastic Films Weekend here.

If you're in the area, I really do recommend coming for some filmic treats this weekend. Do come and join us for the FFW! Flash Gordon starts at 12.00 today!
miss_s_b: (Default)
Thursday Night is Liberal Drinks West Yorkshire (invite yourself on Facebook or Flock Together - or just turn up like [personal profile] burkesworks usually does ;)) in which we will drink liberally and plot to take over the world, and then this weekend is the 8th FuffWoo, in which geeks from all over everywhere will descend on Bradford to watch cheesy horror and sci-fi in our marvellous National Media Museum (invite yourself on Facebook or buy tickets). The films on offer include:
  • Flash Gordon
  • the Call of Cthulhu
  • The Satanic Rites of Dracula
  • a midnight screening of Shaun of the Dead
  • a 70mm print of Aliens
  • IMAX Star Trek and Watchmen
  • and the old silent treat Vampyr with a new score played by a live band.
It's going to be awesome! Unfortunately it will probably interfere with blogging a fair bit too...

Oh well. Time to dye hair and tiday house a bit for visitors. For those keeping track, gmail inbox currently stands at 171 unread, and Faceache inbox at a mere 49. ;)

About This Blog

Hello! I'm Jennie (known to many as SB, due to my handle, or The Yorksher Gob because of my old blog's name). This blog is my public face; click here for a list of all the other places you can find me on t'interwebs.

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